Wish on the Breeze
by whiteswan
Summary: A quick two chapter look into two characters' minds.
1. Ken

1Wish on the Breeze

Disclaimer: As always, they don't belong to me.

This was an attempt to get a look into a couple of characters minds. Thanks to GoldAngel for the encouragement and persuading me to post this.

It's one of those days that you have to wonder why anyone would wish to destroy such peace. A clear sky, the breeze off the sea in my face, and a beautiful girl beside me. What more could a guy ask right?

The ferry ride between Utoland and Okinawa truly is a relaxing thing. Even the thoughts of the recon mission we're heading towards can't keep my team's spirits down on this trip. It's a rare chance for us to relax en route and enjoy ourselves. Jinpei and Ryu are on the lower deck, I can see them from here. They're having fun feeding the better portion of Jinpei's lunch to the seagulls. Joe's down on the car deck, watching over the G2, G3, and G4, the only vehicles we're bringing along on this mission. He volunteered for that job...although I'm sure that the blonde attendant on duty had something to do with that offer. I wish him luck.

And Jun's just joined me here at the forward rail. All present and accounted for. I relax a bit and indulge in a glance out of the corner of my eye at my third in command. Her long hair is whipping behind her in the wind and I close my eyes as a lock brushes across my cheek. So soft. I have to beat back the urge to catch that strand, run my hand through it. Which would, of course, lead to pulling her closer to me, wrapping an arm around her to steady her against the roll of the ship, bending to kiss...

Whoa, time to put the kibosh on that line of thought Washio, it's only going to lead to trouble. She's my third in command, damn the fact. No matter how much I want to, I can't act on those thoughts. For the sake of the team. Although it gets harder and harder every day.

There's a brush against my leg and I hear Jun laugh, so I go against my better judgement, considering my thoughts at the moment, and look to see what caught her attention. Bad idea. The scene in front of me now is one of those that makes it twice as hard not to give in to what my heart really wants. A little kid is standing next to me, peeking between the rails. Jun's stepped slightly away from me to let the boy stand between us, letting him have a prime viewing spot and somewhat protecting him from the wind. I don't even think she realizes that she does it, it's a natural instinct of hers, to protect kids. She's down on one knee now, listening to the boy chatter. Her hair's still whipping around her and she shivers a bit as a cloud momentarily blocks the sun, and the wind yanks at her shirt, but her attention is all for the boy. He's showing her some stuffed animal, a toy dog I think, and a couple of pipe cleaners. Damned if I can figure out what's so fascinating about them. But somehow, once again, she understands. A couple of seconds and a few twists of her fingers later and the dog now has a leash, one end looped over the kid's finger. A quick reminder to hold on tight to the toy and she stands as he runs back over to his dad who's been standing nearby the whole time. I exchange nods with the father, reassuring him that his kid was no trouble. Hell, he was great. I admit, I don't know much about kids, but anything that can bring that smile to Jun's face is perfectly alright with me. It's so rare to see her that truly happy that I sometimes forget what's missing until I see it return. She's always loved kids, been around them as long as I've known her. It started with Jinpei. I mean, how many nine year old girls do you know that could take in a toddler and raise it better than most adult women ever could? That's what she's done. And every time we run into kids on our missions, I see it again. The scientist's daughter who I took in for a while, that little kid who helped us escape the mind control ray by taking us to his secret hideout, even Jinpei's friend Maria...she's great with them, understands them all. She'll make a great mother someday...and I wish I could be the one she shares that with. But I can't. My damned duty won't allow me to.

Every time I see her with kids, it's inevitable that I have that dream soon after. It starts out great, something I truly want...I see Jun holding a baby...boy or girl I'm not quite sure. It's head's covered in black curls, just like it's mother's. She looks up and gives me a smile full of love and happiness and I step forward to join her, wrapping my arms around them both. The baby opens it's eyes and looks up at me, sky blue eyes that match my own, full of curiosity and I have to hold back my tears. But inevitably, the scene turns into a nightmare. I see her again, holding the baby and giving me that brave but sad smile of hers as I go off on some duty mission, not sure whether or not I'll make it back alive. Then she's crying, and I want to go to her but I can't reach her. Hakase and Joe are there, trying to comfort her, having just told her that I was killed in the line of duty. Just like my own mother when my father left that last time. Then I'm waking up in a cold sweat and turning in bed, hoping to see her next to me and left disappointed once again when I find myself alone. I love her, though I can never admit it aloud. Even if I could, how could I ask her to go through that, to face the possibility of being left alone if I'm killed?

I turn back to the view in front of me and sigh, trying to let the sea breeze soothe my mind and heart. Jun gives me a worried glance, sensing the change in my mood. She knows me so well it scares me sometimes. I give her a quick smile to tell her I'm alright, but she doesn't look completely convinced. Send up a quick prayer for a distraction, something to help me avoid those all too perceptive green eyes. One comes, in the form of that same little boy. He's back at the rail, fascinated by the sea gulls. His father comes up next to me, a little girl in his arms and another boy running nearby. The one at the rail wants to see over it, but his dad's arms are full. I give him a quick glance and he nods permission, so I pick the kid up and let him look. Don't ask me why I did that, I just did. I think Jun's rubbing off on me. The kid says something to her and she steps closer to hear him better over the wind. Can only imagine the picture we must make right at this moment...all the appearances of a happy little family. Not exactly the kind of distraction I was hoping for, this is just making things worse.

A few minutes later the kid squirms so I let him down and he runs off again, his dad close behind. I can see Jun watching them, a look on her face I can't quite interpret. I ask if she's okay, and I get her usual cheerful expression in return as she turns to face me. Dammit, I hate it when she closes off like that, when she tries to hide whatever is bothering her from me. But, then again, I'm often guilty of the same sin and I can guess what's on her mind, probably the same thing as my own. When the hell's this war going to be over so the lot of us can settle down and have normal lives, families of our own, not just the occasional interaction with others'? Will we even live long enough to see it? She will. As long as I'm still breathing, she'll have that chance.

The boat's pulling up to the dock and our relaxing time is almost over. Time to get back into character. Just as that thought crosses my mind, the boat bumps the dock a bit too hard, sending the few people still on deck stumbling to regain their balance. I grab the rail to steady myself, but Jun wasn't quite so lucky. I make a grab for her waist and pull her close to balance us both, steadying her as the ship evened itself off. She leans against me for a moment, getting her footing back and it takes all I have not to kiss her right then. K'so, what the hell does fate have against me, putting the girl of my dreams so close to me and where she couldn't be any further out of reach? She's got her balance back now and I loosen my hold, allowing her to stand alone, but keeping an arm there in case whatever idiot is docking this thing goes for another lurch. I make sure she's alright as we descend back to the car deck and steel myself for more personal torture. The lack of my plane means I'm doubling up with Jun on her motorcycle for the trip to the base. Normally, it's my second favorite way to travel but after the last half hour it's going to be a sore test of my self restraint. I climb on board the bike and help her balance the thing, not that she needs any assistance. Footsteps and good natured bickering behind us herald the arrival of the other three as they climb back into their own vehicles, Ryu riding in the buggy with Jinpei. Engines start up and we head off to the base. I just want to get this mission over with. After it's done, I have a lot of thinking to do.


	2. Jun

1Disclaimer: I only dream. They belong to Tatsunoko Productions.

I love these rare times when we can actually relax on our way to a mission. It's beautiful out here on the water, nothing to worry about for the time being. The guys have scattered around the ferry, each to their own preferred activities. Joe's flirting, Ryu and Jin are feeding the birds on one of the upper decks and Ken disappeared almost before I finished parking the bike. Most likely off thinking too much for his own good somewhere, if I know him. He hasn't seemed like himself today, and I'm a little worried about him. I can't help but wonder what's on his mind.I head up to the top deck, my favorite place on any ferry ride, where the wind is strongest. Strong enough to take my worries away for a while. And sometimes strong enough that I almost feel as if I could fly from there, even without my wings.

As I go out onto the deck, I can see Ken standing at the rail and I need to stop for a minute to try to slow my heart rate. He's facing into the wind, and his hair's flying around his face. I nearly giggle as the sight reminds me of the conversation he and Hakase had the other day; Hakase was pestering him about getting a haircut again. I find it a welcome touch of normalcy to our insane lives, to hear the great Gatchaman be told he needs a haircut, just like any other teenager getting pestered by his father. It always makes me smile. But truthfully, what gets to me most is to see him like he is now, relaxing for a change.

I finally move forward and join him at the rail, and have to smile at the look on his face. He looks at peace for once, and that's been an all too rare expression on his face these days. I do feel a little hurt inside at the thought; usually he will talk to me when something's on his mind, but these days it feels like he's slammed a door shut between us, one I have no idea how to open again. But he glances over at me out of the corner of his eye as I lean on the rail and I feel that door crack a tiny bit-he smiles at me, that smile I love so much. I smile back and turn to enjoy the breeze. Tense or not, our usual communication is still there. Ken knows that he can talk to me when he needs to. As I turn back towards the water, I can see a strange expression cross his face momentarily and I have to resist the urge to ask what's wrong. I wish he'd open up to me, but I also know better than to push him, or he'll lock up like a clam, retreating behind that Gatchaman mask of his. I force myself to remain relaxed, I don't want him to see me worry. The Eagle has this _thing _about not wanting anyone to worry about him, but too damn bad, because I worry anyways. I love him. But I can't say either thing so I just watch the gulls fight over bits of what I suspect is my little brother's sandwich and keep an eye on the man I love out of the corner of my eye. If he decides to tell me what's on his mind, I'll be waiting.

There's a brush against my leg and I look down to see a little boy bouncing up and down, trying to see the gulls. He's a short little guy so I step back and let him hang on the rail. Ken looks at him, a bit startled. He really must have been lost in thought there. I wonder what about.

The little boy tugs on my shirt trying to tell me something I can't quite hear over the wind, so I kneel down to listen, shivering a bit. The wind's just picked up. In a classic child's rapid change of subject, the little boy stops talking about the gulls and is now showing me a new toy dog his father had bought him, but he's upset that he can't manage to make a leash for him. He pulls a couple of pipe cleaners from his pockets which are an easy solution to the leash problem. It only takes a few moments and now the leash is in place, one end looped over his finger. Man, this kid is adorable, he reminds me a lot of Jinpei when he was younger. I get a big grin from him and then he's running off to find his dad. I glance up and catch an odd look on Ken's face before it slides back to friendly neutral and he offers a hand to help me up. I'd give a lot to know what's going through his mind right now, but he just helps me to my feet and nods to the kid's father, who was standing nearby.

I know I probably have a stupid grin on my face, but it's hard to avoid. I love kids...if I didn't, Jinpei would never have lived to see twelve years old. I'll admit, I do want a few of my own someday, but for the moment that dream's pretty far out of reach. One reason being, obviously, the war. I can't exactly settle down until it's over. Not to mention that the only guy I'd even _want_ to have kids with is not only my Commander for the time being, but also seems to be totally oblivious to the fact that I've been in love with him for years. Stubborn male. He's so focused on his duty. I love him for that, even if he does drive me crazy at times.

Speaking of said Eagle, he's looking rather tense again. I give him a curious glance but he just sends me that quick, 'don't worry' grin and turns to look out at the water. Damn him!

The little one's back now, he wants to see the gulls again. His father's nearby too, arms already full with a little girl, as cute as her brother. My, my, Ken still manages to surprise me sometimes, even after all these years. He just picked the little guy up so that he can see over the rail. I don't think he realizes just how good he is with children, even though we're not around them all that much. He always has been. The boy's talking to us both now and I have to move closer to them to hear over the wind, and try to control the blush I can feel coming on. I can just imagine how we must look right now and I can feel the wish forming in my heart before squashing it down again. The boy squirms and Ken lets him down. I can't help but watch as he runs back to his father and I wonder if I'll ever be able to have a couple of those little monsters of my own. I wish that Galactor would just give up and get out of our lives. I do feel somewhat selfish in wishing for that but it can't be helped. I want the chance for a family of my own with the man I love. Just have to hope that he wants that too. And that we're both alive to see it.

I jump as Ken suddenly lays a gentle hand on my shoulder, bringing me out of my thoughts. Those blue eyes of his seem like they're trying to see straight through me as he asks if I'm ok. Give him a quick smile and assure him I'm fine. No way can I tell him what I was just thinking. I don't think he totally believes me but he doesn't push the issue and I'm grateful for it. As soon as we dock, he'll be distracted by the mission and hopefully will forget all about this little conversation. Maybe someday I can tell him how much I care about him but not now.

The boat's pulling up to the dock now so I push away from the rail to head back down to the car deck. All of a sudden, the boat jolts under my feet and I feel my balance going...kuso this is going to hurt. Wait...Ken's caught me, an arm around my waist and this time I can't stop the blush from forming. Thankfully he doesn't seem to notice, he's too busy keeping us both on our feet and glaring towards the bridge. I get my footing back but almost regret it, because that means he takes his arm from around me. Damn. He's still got it at my back though, making sure I don't fall again, I guess, as we head back down to the car deck. I have to hide a smile behind my hair as we board my bike. I always enjoy having Ken ride tandem with me. No matter what the circumstances, it's always reassuring to have his arms around me when we ride, even if he doesn't feel the same.

The others have rejoined us and the boat's unloading. Time to be the Swan again. But you know what? Even Swans wish sometimes.


End file.
